I have been a terrible blogger but with two sweet reasons why: Lola and Ollie. They are exhausting and time consuming to say the least, but loved unconditionally all day long and all night, especially Ollie since he is up at night. The kiddo has his days and nights mixed up which is making me want to go insane and I think I have visited insanity a few times- but trying hard to keep a nice steady pace each day. Looking forward to some coos, smiles, and 5 hour stretches of sleep. For now I am settling with cries, excessive poops, and 1 hour naps. Lola has been more patient than myself and just loves her little brother. She wants to hold him all the time, but only for 30 seconds. She is as sweet as she can be to him for 30 seconds, then tells me "Why don't you hold him now Momma" then runs off to play. Jealousy doesn't seem to be an issue, thank goodness. Although, she is more clingy to me and him which has been displayed by crying at school (not typical) and the other day she decided not to spend the night at Nonna's and come home (again not typical). I personally think it's sweet she misses me and Ollie, even though I don't encourage the clingy behavior because I want her to have her normal fun! All in all I think she is adjusting wonderfully.
Clay has been a good help especially with Lola, but I need him to grow a pair of milky boobs to really be able to help. LOL I totally forgot how demanding breastfeeding is. I remembered not loving it by any means and made a goal to EBF (exclusively breastfeed) for 3 months this time. Working hard to hit that goal, but boy oh boy, that's a tough one. That combined with days and nights mixed up: baby #2, Ollie Boy, gets the point for most exhausting baby yet. He sleeps more than Lola did, cries more than Lola did, eats more than Lola did, spits up more than Lola did. With that said, I think he will be a laid back boy once we work out his fussy issues. And I will be a much prettier person, inside and out. It's funny because despite a baby being demanding and somewhat boring (a little more boring the second time around) you seriously love these little beings you created more than life itself. I talk to him all day and it kind of weird Clays out and I want to hold him if someone is just because I miss him. I love how motherly love works. I look forward to loving them all of their lives. They may hate me one because I simply love them too much. Haha...
Today I barely brushed my hair, managed to brush my teeth, and didn't put an ounce of makeup on all while in my pajamas. Oh and I ran an errand or two like this :) Hey- I had to grab some toile to make Lola's birthday tutu. I am caving all around like making an actual tutu for Lola. Not my thing, but the girl loves to dress up and why shouldn't she dress her little heart out? Isn't that one of her only jobs as a cheerful soon-to-be three year old- DRESS UP! Makes me seriously want to dress up a little too.
I have a blog post almost ready about the hospital stay so I will try and upload that soon. It's on my other computer and I just wanted to take a few moments to journal tonight so I could try and get some sleep. I think about all of this and how i want to write down my thoughts instead of sleeping, so there- it's done.
Good night world- enjoy your 7 hours of sleep tonight! I will be thinking of you as I am up bouncing a baby to Lana Del Ray record blaring at 4 a.m. just to get Ollie to relax for a bit. Sweet dreams.